i hope my words are strange and wondrous,

like kisses that quiet all things superfluous,

so that we can all stop and

listen

today i am craving ice cream in a cone,

pillow fights and high-pitched laughter,

reckless abandon as we roll about in sheets that smell of milk

and cookies.

today i think of drawing in your palms as you guess the words

and i teach you how to braid my hair,

we trade glasses as i tie your hair up in bunches with multi-colored

rubber bands.

today i am snuggling under a blanket as a cartoon

plays on the screen, or we are both reading

and the quiet is delicious because it is about to be broken by

a sly tickle.

today i don't like that girl because she didn't like princesses

growing up and that really is the only reason i have

but we forget quickly once we begin a game of

hide and seek.

today i wouldn't have to grow up, and face my fears,

or battle the overwhelming sense of burden in understanding

that my heart is a weak one, and my desires are not always the

best for me.

and today, i am writing a paper.

a full agenda overflowing for the next 24 hours,

absent-mindedly, trying to figure out what to throw in the frying pan tonight

for a packed lunch tomorrow.

for citations and paper formatting, overdue trips to dollarama

and keeping up with meeting minutes.

ignoring the growing pile of dishes in the sink and the fact that it is getting later

and later in the evening but my list of things to do has not lessened.

today i am sitting here with a grin that speaks nostalgia as i bury

my fingers into a high-pile rug and wished i were a little girl again.

today i am marveling at how i got to be this age, with this body and this heart,

in this place at this time and how it really is amazing how things change.

today i am visiting a little girl,

her smile leaves no trace of bitterness,

and i smile with her, even though i know it won't be long

before she makes the journey to the future,

before her smile becomes mine.

today i am visiting little

me.