i hope my words are strange and wondrous,

like kisses that quiet all things superfluous,

so that we can all stop and

listen

i can't recap this year, without remembering you.

but you have dropped in significance,

and so you shall be a middling sort of number,

but what is left to say about you?

as i approach these last days of this 19th year i find,

that the words have gotten fewer.

i remember you yet,

and there are many triggers,

which, when pulled,

puff wisps of you into my consciousness.

i watch them in wonder:

their quick fading,

their fleeting beauty,

their gradual disappearance.

soon you will cease to be you,

because 'you' is the direct address of me,

and you no longer deserve that title.

this me will always have you to thank,

for showing me new and wondrous things,

for making some of the funniest moments,

for giving me my first taste of love.

this me, will also always have you to thank,

for showing me the worst and ugliest ideas,

for making that which i value most into triviality,

for giving up, for giving in, for giving away.

it is always bittersweet.

but i am coming to embrace it with a grip that is

comfortable.

i am becoming comfortable,

without

you.